Bittersweet memories

These are pics of Andrey's last moments in the orphanage - as we were leaving a caregiver said goodbye to him & in Russian said "he was like my son." My favorite are the pics of the car ride home. I know i've posted some pics like this before but as time goes by i'm actually able to appreciate the experience more. As my love for Andrey grows, things become more meaningful. When i was in Russia, i was in survival mode..doing what i had to do despite my fears/worries, etc. It's taken me 6 months to look back at some of these pics & actually take them in!

Today at the park we met a woman from Russia. I asked if she would speak to Andrey in Russian. I've met a few people throughout the months who were Russian speaking & who did this. Today, i started to cry when i heard the Russian words come out of her mouth to the ears of my little Siberian tiger. The tears came from the emotion of the memories of the caregivers that we heard speak Russian to Andrey, they came from knowing that Andrey would never be a Russian, living & speaking & eating Russian. I actually felt compassion towards him as i know more about his beginnings than he does - what my eyes have seen, what pictures we took, will all be showed to him one day. As the days grow farther & farther away from our month long stay in Moscow/Siberia, i can call upon the sweet memories of our beginning with Andrey. So i'm going to post more & more pics of the beginning as if i'm re-living it in a sense & have more courage now to feel the feelings. I was pretty much on a mission there & shut down of lots of feelings cause i was just trying to survive our conditions.